Challenge 14: What to do when you are the only one in your relationship ready to get to the next level

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I’m in a 5 years long relationship with my boyfriend and we are living together for 3,5 years. We are both a bit over 30 and we have had a good relationship so far, although I feel like I’m the mature one. I always take care of our vacation and organize other things; he on the other hand never seems to have enough money and is mainly into playing football which is his passion.

I am ready to bring the relationship to next level and have a family

so lately I’ve talked  to him about getting engaged, having a child and maybe buying a house (currently we are renting). Although he always said he wants to have children he doesn’t have any initiative, there is only talk and no action. He also doesn’t seem to hurry to propose – he gives me excuses like “I want to do it in front of your family” And about the house, he said he would talk with landlord regarding  the possibilities but haven’t done it yet and it’s been weeks since he said he’ll do it… And did I mention that he has no savings?

So the conversation didn’t go so well.

I got frustrated and stopped talking to him (and now he is upset with me for that). I told him that when he will finally figure out what is his plan for life, he should let me know. I don’t want to press him for engagement as he will most probably point it out till the rest of our lives that “I forced” him to get married with me, but then again, I don’t want to wait any longer.

I thought we were a good couple, people always said he seemed to be so in love with me.

But lately I don’t feel it’s the same anymore. For example, I don’t remember when was the last time I’ve received flowers or a little gift from him.

So now I’m waiting for him to make up his mind, but honestly if he is not on the same page with me soon, I am ready to end this relationship even if I don’t want to.

Do you have any advice for me in this situation?


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